THE LITTLE JACK WHO SHARED MY CHILDHOOD

by ALAINA ABLES
(HAVERTOWN, PA)

I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL YESTERDAY FOR A PROBLEM I HAVE WHEN I GOT A CALL THAT MY BELOVED DOG WHO I'VE GROWN UP WITH SINCE AGE FIVE WAS BEING PUT TO SLEEP SHE COULD BARELY PICK HER HEAD UP AND HER BREATHING WAS VERY VERY WEAK BUT I LATER FOUND OUT SHE SAT ON THAT TABLE AND HER HEART GAVE OUT ON ITS OWN SO SHE DIDN'T GET THE NEEDLE SHE ALWAYS HATED. THE VET AND I FEEL BAD NOW. ME AND MY LITTLE BROTHER USED TO TEASE HER AND TELL HER IT WAS VET TIME BUT WE WERE KIDS THEN. SHE WAS A FIGHTER. WE GOT THREE EXTRA YEARS WITH HER WHICH I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR. SHE HAD RECENTLY CELEBRATED HER FOURTEENTH BIRTHDAY ON DECEMBER TWENTY SECOND. SHE HAD CANCER IN HER ANUS AND SHE HAD TO ENDURE GREAT PAIN JUST GOING TO THE BATHROOM. BUT SHE STAYED ALIVE AND TILL THE DAY SHE DIED PROTECTED US. I MISS HER SOOOO MUCH. THE WORST WAS NOT BEING ALLOWED HOME TO SAY GOODBYE. I SPOKE TO HER ONE LAST TIME ON THE PHONE AND WE COULDN'T BURY HER. OUR VET WOULDN'T LET US. BUT I GOT A LITTLE BIT OF HER FUR AND IT STILL SMELLS LIKE HER. I WILL CHERISH IT FOREVER. I MEAN I'M IN DENIAL RIGHT NOW. I CAME HOME AND NO ONE GREETED ME AT THE DOOR. HER DISH WAS GONE. HER BED WAS GONE. AND HER TOYS WERE ALL GONE. YOU COULD FEEL IT EVERYWHERE. SOMEONE WAS MISSING AND FOR EIGHTEEN YEARS I HAD HAD THE LUXURY OF NOT LOSING SOMEONE VERY CLOSE TO ME. UNTIL NOW SHE WAS MY EVERYTHING. I TOLD HER EVERYTHING. SHE ALWAYS KNEW WHEN I WAS UPSET EVEN THO I NEVER WANTED TO ADMIT IT. I REMEMBER HER WAVING FOR FOOD. WE HAD TAUGHT HER TO BEG JUST ONE YEAR AGO. YOU CAN TEACH AN OLD DOG NEW TRICKS. I'LL ALWAYS REMEMBER ONE CHRISTMAS. SHE LAID DOWN NEXT TO ONE SPECIFIC BOX AND DIDN'T LEAVE. WE TOUCHED HER PAWS AND HELPED HER OPEN IT AND IT WAS HER TREATS. SHE LAID BY THAT BOX ALL DAY. I'LL ALWAYS REMEMBER WHEN SHE WOULD PEER INTO MY BROTHERS CRIB AND LAY, WATCHING OVER HIM. AND SHE WOULD ALWAYS GO DOWNSTAIRS AND MAKE SURE EVERYONE WAS ASLEEP BEFORE HEADING TO BED UPSTAIRS. UNTIL THE LAST FEW YEARS SHE'D STILL WAIT, BUT FALL ASLEEP ON A NICE WARM SPOT ON THE CARPET NEAR THE DOOR. I'LL ALWAYS REMEMBER WHEN SHE PEERED INTO THE BATH TUB AND HELPED US LOOK FOR MY BROTHERS HAMSTER WHO HAD RUN AWAY. HER LITTLE FRONT PAWS STOOD HER UP AND SHE LOOKED AND LOOKED. AND WHEN SHE HAD CHOKED ON A MEATBALL SHE WENT AND PUT HER HEAD INTO THE TOILET TO THROW UP BECAUSE SHE HAD LEARNED FROM STAYING WITH US. SHE WOULD SPLASH WITH US IN OUR BABY POOL BUT WOULDN'T DARE GET A BATH. I WILL NEVER FORGET WHEN WE WERE EATING EASTER DINNER AND MY GRANDMOTHER GAVE HER HER FOOD AND SHE SPIT IT OUT STEPPED ON IT AND LEFT THE ROOM BECAUSE SHE WANTED HAM. IT WAS HYSTERICAL. AND A FEW MONTHS AGO SHE SPIT MARSHMALLOWS AT ME BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T WANT THAT TO EAT AT THREE AM. ITS KINDA WEIRD NOT TAKING HER DOWN THROUGHOUT THE NIGHT I USED TO HATE IT BUT INSIDE I MISS IT. IT'S SOOO HARD I CAN'T THINK OF A DAY GROWING UP WITHOUT HER. EVEN ON VACATION I KNEW SHE'D BE WAITING. AND I'LL NEVER FORGET WE WENT TO DISNEY WORLD AND MY UNCLE WATCHED HER. AND SHE RAN DOWN THE STREET BECAUSE SHE WAS LOOKING FOR US AND HEARD KIDS PLAYING. AND HER PRINCESS STAGE OF DRAGGING HER WHEN SHE REFUSED TO WALK ANY FURTHER AND SIT IN ONCOMING TRAFFIC AND CARRYING HER HOME. I MISS SLEEPING WITH HER. I MISS PLAYING WITH HER. I MISS JUST TALKING WITH HER. I MISS THE WAY SHE SMELLED. I MISS HER ONE LITTLE SPOT ON HER BACK. I MISS HER WAVE. I MISS EVERYTHING ABOUT HER. I AM TRULY BLESSED TO HAVE HAD SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DOG. TO GROW UP WITH FROM AGE FIVE TO AGE EIGHTEEN SHE HAS NEVER LET ME DOWN EVEN WHEN THE WORLD HAD. SHE WAS MY PROTECTOR, MY PLAYMATE, MY FRIEND. I JUST CANT BELIEVE SHE'S GONE. I'M WAITING FOR HER TO RUN UP THOSE STAIRS FOR ME TO TAKE HER OUT. I TAUGHT HER TO TALK. YOU ASK HER A QUESTION AND WAVE IF THAT'S WHAT SHE WANTED AND SHE DID. WE TOOK HER FOR ONE LAST PICTURE WITH SANTA AND I WILL CHERISH THAT FOREVER. I CONFIDED IN YOU AND EVEN THO U COULDN'T ANSWER I KNEW YOU HEARD ME. YOU TOOK US IN AS YOUR OWN AND PROTECTED US BECAUSE YOU COULDN'T HAVE PUPPIES. YOU WOULD RUN AND STAND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STAIRS AND NOT LET THEM WAKE US UP FOR SCHOOL. YOU WOULD STAND IN BETWEEN FIGHTS AND PROTECT US. YOU ALWAYS TOOK YOUR LITTLE ADVENTURES OUT OF THE YARD AND WE'D SEARCH FOR YOU. BUT YOU'D ALWAYS COME FROM ANYWHERE FOR ME. DON'T TELL BUT I THINK YOU LOVED ME THE MOST. AND I COULD TELL YOU'RE A GOOD GIRL AND A LITTLE FIGHTER. AND YOU'RE STUBBORN. BUT I WOULD GIVE ANYTHING TO HAVE ONE MORE DAY WITH YOU. I WANT YOU TO KNOW I MISS YOU TERRIBLY AND I LOVE YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING. I'M SORRY I WASN'T ALLOWED TO SAY GOODBYE. AND NOW ILL NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN AND ITS TEARING ME APART. YOU ARE VERY INDEPENDENT. HA HA REMEMBER WHEN TUPALO TRIED TO HUMP YOU AND YOU BIT HIS NOSE AND HE GOT YELLED AT? ANY WOMAN WOULD BE PROUD. I KNOW I WAS. KEEP DOING THAT IN HEAVEN OK KEEP BEING THE BEAUTIFUL JACK RUSSEL THAT YOU ARE. YOU WILL ALWAYS BE A PART OF MY LIFE. RUN AWAY NOW AND PLAY FOREVER. I LOVE YOU. I MISS YOU. AND WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU. WE SHARED OUR WHOLE CHILDHOOD TOGETHER. BUT NOW ITS TIME TO PART.

GOODBYE.
LOVE ALAINA

O YEA, AND EVEN BOO VOO MISSES YOU. HE CAN'T TEASE YA ANYMORE AND EVEN THO WE LAUGHED WHEN YOU COULDN'T HEAR US WE R SORRY. I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR GONE.

RIP NIKKI BUTLER
DECEMBER TWENTY SECOND NINETEEN NINETY FOUR
TO JANUARY NINTH TWO THOUSAND EIGHT